Don’t apologise I prefer this type of question over the normal “you’re fucked!” questions that fill my box!
Truthfully, I don’t think many gay men understand trans* much more deeply than their experience of a drag show on the weekends. And as for transmen, well! My observation is its treated as some kind of weird unnatural experiment by gay men in general (I say in general because there are always exceptions).
On the two occasions I’ve heard gay men discuss transmen, the gay men related events whereby they met a guy at a bar, thought he was really hot and “masc”, discussed leaving to have sex and at which time the “hot masc guy” revealed he was trans* and by doing so, the deal didn’t go ahead. On both occasions there was a strong “eek” and “ew” factor being related, however my sense is these guys didn’t actually feel any hatred for the transmen, but definitely it wasn’t what they were into.
I’ve also seen one or two transmen on Grindr who I couldn’t tell were trans* until they mentioned it to me, and a couple of others who I knew were transmen – one because he said so in his profile and another by reputation only.
That’s the extent of my experience on this subject. Hope it answered something for you, feel free to message whenever you like – private messages are also cool and respected.